It’s Been Over a Month
I wish I could just say “I’ve been busy,” because it would be partially true. I have been. But it hasn’t been the good kind of busy. October has been a month of disappointment, loss, and extreme pain for me. I don’t necessarily want to bring that into my blog but I also couldn’t really start posting again without acknowledging it. Since my last entry I’ve dealt with a sprained tendon, flying to my hometown to visit my ailing grandfather, returning only to have my sciatic nerve become inflamed and buried deep into my joints causing pain so horrific I was forced to work at home for 2 weeks straight, I then had to start a round of steroids and other meds that made me sick every day, my grandfather’s health diminished further and he unfortunately passed, and now… now I work at home majority of the week and attend very painful physical therapy appointments twice a week. Interacting with anyone right now feels like a huge drain on the energy I have left. But you can’t just pause life until things are better. So many times I go through the motions. Sometimes I can actually enjoy things too. Little escapes or planned distractions. And I’ve had great friends help me through this month as well. Sending me snapchats of seemingly mundane things… it really helps me push through the bad days.
And as October is ending I think things are slowly getting better. The PT is showing some good results. Even if those results are as simple as being able to walk up a flight of stairs without pausing halfway due to increased pain. I look forward to tomorrow’s commute to see if it’s been made any easier after the sessions I’ve had.
I’m also excited for Halloween. Growing up it was my favorite holiday. I’ve already made up the Trick-or-Treat bags last weekend and hopefully I can make a short trip out today to pick up a pumpkin to carve.
Basically any task I can do while seated is happily welcomed.
Did a short overnight camping trip this weekend. I wanted to get some fresh and cool air into my lungs hoping it would help clear up the rest of my flu symptoms. The weather was perfect. Plenty of sun with cooling temperatures at night. When I’m camping I sometimes find it hard to believe that I enjoy it but I truly do. There’s this sense of “letting go” when I’m camping. Trivial things drift out of my mind and I can just be.