Run Away Together?

You know, getting someone to drop everything and runaway with you without a plan or money is A LOT harder than the movies depict. After all the tears all I really learned was that the Art Student was the mature responsible one while the Software Engineering major is the hidden hopeless romantic.

Life’s been so crazy lately I don’t even feel like blogging about it. BIG changes are coming with realizations that the only thing I want to do is crazy and immature. Mike’s already applying to jobs that are 12 hours away. It wouldn’t be so bad if it were somewhere I WANTED to go. But as the time approaches the more I realize I HATE the idea of moving There. Not only because it’s hot & humid and NOT Northeast, not JUST because his nuts-o family lives there. I guess all those reasons and more are why I hate it.

When you knew you’d be alone all you life travelling and you then get the complete opposite… It’s selfish I know… I just worry. Like this horrible prison of family and children and cubicles is awaiting me on this path. I don’t know how to say it to make it make sense. Of course I think of all the positives too, but I only blog these crazy insecure thoughts b/c they are the ones that plague me most. And trust me, I know I’m pessimistic. It’s not NEWS TO ME. I had to hear it so many damn times last night. <_<

I wish time would stop. I’m tired of the ride and I want off. I don’t know what I want and Holy Fuck I need to fuckin’ get it straight SOON.

I’m supposed to be studying for finals week now. I’ve wasted so much time too. Two of my exams are fully cumulative (InfoSec is chapters 1-12 while WinXP Client Net. is chapters 1-15).

Mike will be gone by February. All the “friends” I used to hang out with don’t call anymore really. Last time I saw them they were really sarcastic when I was having troubles with my mom. It didn’t really bother me, I was just thinking bout how lonely I’ll be when Mike leaves. I only have “couple” friends here. With Mike gone, couple friends really aren’t fun to hang out with I guess.

Oh well, sorry to be negative. Oh yea, New CUTiE scans are up: CUTIE OCT 04 & DEC 04. As the website says… the site is sort of closing down. Lots of different reasons I’ll share later.

Oh yea, ARTBOX AMERICA.COM mailed me a refund check *they’ve yet to respond to my emails and their phone lines are still disconnected too*. They sent a short note saying all the items I ordered were “out of stock.” Whatever, I at least got my money back. Even though it’s still weird that their phones were “no longer in service.”

posted at 6:39 pm ; Friday   

1. Carolyn said,

   December 10, 2004 @ 7:13 pm

   Yeah it’s hard to compare life to the movies.. even though I wish it was more like what we see on screen.. how perfect everything always is in the end. It’s a big decision to move 12 hours away.. especially when you’re not comfortable with everything about it. =T *hugs* I hope somehow there can be a compromise or all works out.. like it always does.. in the movies..

2. Destiny said,

   December 10, 2004 @ 7:47 pm

   Movies are more like what the ideal life that people desire… my life is nothing like a movie. It sucks. x_x I don’t think it’s selfish, I think you’re being rather reasonable in trying to sort things out and weigh your options. Lol, being pessimistic is the way yiou survive the world today. >_>;

3. lain said,

   December 10, 2004 @ 9:47 pm

   awe, sorry to hear about all that ;_; i hope you at least have a GOOD holiday season? maybe? hopefully!

4. Peach said,

   December 11, 2004 @ 2:12 am

   I’m glad you got your money back at least. I understand completely about life not being as easy as the movies. It never seems that complicated when you’re on the outside looking in, but when you actually have emotional real-estate in the issue, things get so cloudy =/

5. chiaki said,

   December 11, 2004 @ 12:57 pm

   i’mg lad you got your money back ^__^ and that bag and mirror are so kawaii!

6. Lorik said,

   December 11, 2004 @ 5:44 pm

   life can get really hectic real fast. I hope all will go well. Take some time for yourself and do things slowly in your pace. It’s good to write about the things that bother you to sort of let it all out. I hope you do well on your finals and that everything will turn out ok.

7. Kim said,

   December 11, 2004 @ 11:44 pm

   I’m sorry, dear. Every day is a good day, just some better than others.

   We should learn to start taking our own advice, huh?

   My finals are the final week of January. I hate having to worry about it.

8. Jennifer said,

   December 12, 2004 @ 1:26 am

   I hope everything works out for the best for the both of you. =) Movies are “movies” and life is “life”…which means in a movie it’s never what really happens in our lives. =(

9. luis said,

   December 12, 2004 @ 3:40 pm

   wolk your path 2 not only your heart.

10. saunjie said,

    December 12, 2004 @ 8:12 pm

    Life throws difficult situations your way sometimes but in the end you have to do what’s best for you.

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