Sunday December 12, 2004   

I’ve been studying frantically since Friday for my exams on wed & Thursday. Went out with “the boys” to see Blade Trinity. It’s what I needed to escape boredom of studying. I have to cram A LOT because I REALLY slacked off mid-semester.

Went shopping today. Sundays have become Mike & I go to mall day. Mainly because he has Sundays off lately so we go out, plus Christmas shopping. I bought some more stuff ON SALE. I got these great baby blue heart kitten heeled shoes and some brown over-the-knee socks with brown ribbons on them all for 15$ *pictures later*.

<3: Carolyn Destiny lain Peach chiaki Lorik Kim Jennifer luis saunjie

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Friday December 10, 2004   

You know, getting someone to drop everything and runaway with you without a plan or money is A LOT harder than the movies depict. After all the tears all I really learned was that the Art Student was the mature responsible one while the Software Engineering major is the hidden hopeless romantic.

Life’s been so crazy lately I don’t even feel like blogging about it. BIG changes are coming with realizations that the only thing I want to do is crazy and immature. Mike’s already applying to jobs that are 12 hours away. It wouldn’t be so bad if it were somewhere I WANTED to go. But as the time approaches the more I realize I HATE the idea of moving There. Not only because it’s hot & humid and NOT Northeast, not JUST because his nuts-o family lives there. I guess all those reasons and more are why I hate it.

When you knew you’d be alone all you life travelling and you then get the complete opposite… It’s selfish I know… I just worry. Like this horrible prison of family and children and cubicles is awaiting me on this path. I don’t know how to say it to make it make sense. Of course I think of all the positives too, but I only blog these crazy insecure thoughts b/c they are the ones that plague me most. And trust me, I know I’m pessimistic. It’s not NEWS TO ME. I had to hear it so many damn times last night. <_ <

I wish time would stop. I’m tired of the ride and I want off. I don’t know what I want and Holy Fuck I need to fuckin’ get it straight SOON.

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